There's no such thing as 'figuring it out.' You're either constructing your life to fit your needs or you're complaining about the problems in your life. Which one are you doing?
Have you ever had that magical moment in your life where you stopped and thought to yourself: “How the hell did I get here?
I had this moment on my 30th birthday as I was taking a shower (a notorious place of reflection for me).
I remember thinking, “Oh my God, I’m 30 and haven’t accomplished much in my life. I and I have no stable job or income." At the time I was a daily substitute teacher for the Wauconda, Illinois and Lake County Illinois school districts. I was eight years removed from graduating college with a bachelor’s degree in Arts and Humanities and was lost in my life.
I just remember thinking over and over: but this is not what my life was supposed to look like at this point.
We all seem to have an outlook on what we think our life should look like but the key is whether or not you’re taking the appropriate action to get to your desired outlook. You can talk all day about how life would be perfect to live a life of no worries and to never worry about money. And the funny part is that I know people who lead lives that are worry and money free.
The problem was that I didn’t take the time to figure out what I wanted in life.
Your life won’t ever be perfect. If you understand this, then you’ve eliminated 60% of the wasteful thinking in your brain.
Your life is a constant movement of progress. As a baby, you didn’t know how to communicate effectively. You were communicating but it was through crying, temper tantrums, smiles, laughs, etc. As you got older, you learned how to speak the language you heard most and then you learned the art of communication. Some have even learned other languages in addition to. The point is that everyone is on their own path of progress. Everyone starts somewhere and moves at their own pace.
So if you’re asking yourself, “how the hell did I get here”, this is an indicator that it’s time to take control of your life.
The Importance of Writing Down Goals
I used to hate doing this. I used to ask myself, “what’s the point? I know what I want. I have it stored in my head.” That’s great and all but unless you have your goals written down and have you've attacked them on a daily basis, you’ll end up wherever life decides to take you.
It’s the equivalent of going to the gym with a written plan of attack of the exercises you’ll be doing as opposed to having the exercises in mind and then going to the gym. Which is more time efficient and effective? The former. Why? It’s a plan of attack as opposed to fumbling around with which exercise to start to only get sidetracked by talking to that gym buddy for fifteen minutes too long.
A plan always makes it easier to track your progress and to have a target to hit for the next time you go on the attack.
Stop Replaying The Woulda Coulda Shouldas
This is a definite no-no. Do not, I repeat, do not highlight what you didn’t do. It’s maddening. You’re only cycling through all of your faults thus creating a viscous replay of your shortcomings. Don’t worry about what you didn't do, worry only about what you can do. I’ve always said that you have to have a sense of amnesia. Act like the bad event didn’t even happen. Move forward. That’s where you’re going anyway.
Take control of your life. Go on the attack. Look for problems to solve and solve them. Be a beast when it comes to attacking your day. The best way to attack your day is to have a daily routine. My daily routine is one that I've used for five years and it has helped with getting me through the day. It’s the one thing that I have control over and it helps to get my mind right no matter how my day is going. If everything falls apart, at least I know that I have control of my routine.
Nothing in life is perfect. We're all looking to improve our life and be the best versions of ourselves everyday.
Stop thinking that others have it perfect based on some merit that you’ve derived as the Holy Grail of Perfection. It’s simply not true.
The people that you deem to have perfect lives also have issues of their own that they deal with on a daily basis. Maintain focus on your goals, dreams and desires and go after them like your life depends on it.
This will ensure that you live a life of purpose and not a life merely of mundane activities.
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